Thursday, April 2, 2009

surgery follow up apt

I had some pain this morning on my way into work. Since the cerclage surgery, I've felt more pressure and pain if my bladder is not emptied quickly. So with traffic being really bad from Alabster into Pelham because of construction, I took my typical side route through Oak Mountain, but it was still a longer trip than usual. By the time I got to 119, I was hurting and stopped into Mcdonald's to tee tee. I felt better afterwards, but once I got into work, the pain kinda turned into a lower side-stich pain, like you feel on a long run's start. I went to the bathroom a few more times, and it seemed to subside. I was scheduled to see Dr. Ramsey today at 3:15 anyway but when the pain started again at lunchtime, I decided to go ahead and head downtown early-plus, the storms are gonna be pretty bad this afternoon, and I needed to go by and pick up Tobi's new red\black ear molds and his hearing aid, that was sent off for repair, and had come back in. I'm so thankful that the MFM (Maternal Fetal Medicine) clinic always squeezes me in without a second thought. Dr. Ramsey was paged that I had come early and came right over. I did a "clean catch" urin specimen. He listenned with the dopplar and her heart beat was fine. He pushed around on me and said that because it was more to the side, it didnt sound like a problem from the cerclage, but would double ck the urin to make sure there was no blood in it that could be coming from the bladder. He gave me my prescription for the compounding pharmacy to get my hydroxprogesterone shots, that I'll start in 3 weeks from today-16 weeks. We talked a few minutes about my precious friend Rachel, (that God joined me with a couple of weeks after Layah's funeral. Matt's mom and her husband Thomas were having issues with the water spouts at the cemetery and began talking.) who was my soon-to-be doctor, Dr. Joey Biggio's patient with her pregnancy in December 2007 when she and Thomas lost their son, Isaac, on the day he was born, from Trisomy 16. I was telling him to let Dr. Biggio know that she's having a baby girl in July, (as she's seeing another OB in the practice now). Before either of us were pregnant, we talked about wanting the same sex baby that we'd lost, which apparently is typical. So when she found out they were having a girl, I asked her about the feelings she had. I wondered if there was any disappointment along with her joy. I realized in our talk, that it seems that our brain & emotions must "reset" the minute that the baby's sex is determined because then it's no longer an "it" but there is an identity to this life in you. With Trisomy babies, the condition is the baby has a whole extra set of chromosomes, similar to Down's Syndrome where there is just 1 single extra chromosome, but Trisomy babies, for the most part, not compatible with life because of this, but the condition is diagnosed fairly early, about 16 weeks. So the pregnancy is a long and sad pregnancy with usually a fatal outcome. As Rachel's fears were of this baby's health, and once everything was measured and was perfect, her worry was not gone because of just the common pregnancy possible complications, but was minimized concerning the Trisomy. However, with me, I really wont be completely without worry, until I hold our sweet baby in my arms. I have peace, but of course there are human feelings that I have to wrestle with. Afterall, my children are perfect. I am the one that is "incompitent" as the diagnosis portrays. I know God makes no mistakes, so I guess I picture myself with traits of Jacob who wrestled the angel and walked with a limp the rest of his life. Not because God couldnt heal him, but because He wanted it to be reminder of his dependence on God. I could have had perfect pregnancies, but I wouldnt be who I am today had I. Well, keep praying. Please pray that my discomfort will dissipate and it will be something minor like inflammation from the healing cervix, or pulling ligaments or a bladder/kidney infection that can be resolved with antibiotics. We know this child is promised and He will bring life to us in September.

Faithfully His,

Mika

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